The #Endowarrior Litany of Humility

*** This litany emerged from a night of grappling with God’s plan for my life as a Daughter of the King and as a woman. Where is the source of my worth & dignity? Why must I bear this cross? Why am I lovable? What is authentic femininity? I decided to stop grasping. I truly desire healing and restoration, but I desire being united with God more- come what may. God’s ways are not my ways. You are beautiful. You are enough. You are Made in His Image. ***

THE LITANY OF HUMILITY:

O Jesus! meek and humble of heart, Hear me.
From the desire of being esteemed, Deliver me, Jesus.

From the desire of being a biological mother …
From the desire of being loved for my reproductive health …
From the desire of being extolled for my reproductive health …  
From the desire of being honored for my reproductive health … 
From the desire of being praised for my reproductive health … 
From the desire of being preferred for my reproductive health …
From the desire of being consulted for my reproductive health … 
From the desire of being approved for my reproductive health … 

From the fear of being humiliated because of my womanly struggles …
From the fear of being despised because of my womanly struggles …
From the fear of suffering rebukes because of my womanly struggles …
From the fear of being calumniated because of my womanly struggles …
From the fear of being forgotten because of my womanly struggles …
From the fear of being ridiculed because of my womanly struggles …
From the fear of being wronged because of my womanly struggles …
From the fear of being suspected because of my womanly struggles …

That others may be loved more than I:
Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may be esteemed more than I as a biological mother, wife, & woman …
That, in the opinion of the world, others may increase and I may decrease … That my trust in your loving and merciful plan for my life may increase … That salvific suffering may open my heart to love beyond measure …
That others may be chosen and I set aside …
That others may be praised and I unnoticed …
That others may be preferred to me in everything…
That others may become holier than I, provided that I may become as holy as I should…

AMEN.

** original text for the Litany of Humility was found on ewtn.com

NFP Raw & Unscripted: An Encounter with Popes & Saints

Rome, Italy- Fall 2018

When I envisioned Rome and the Vatican, shedding dewy tears in the Tomb of the Popes beneath St. Peter’s Basilica kneeling before the Tomb of now St. Pope Paul VI wasn’t my first vision or any vision for that matter. My Italy trip, generously bequeathed by my parents, coincided with the preparations for the canonization for Pope Paul VI and Oscar Romero along with the beginning of the Synod on Youth. I’m a private person (so sayeth the Catholic blogger.) What drove a private, composed girl like me to shed private, composed tears in Rome? Of human life.

For those familiar with Compline or Night prayer you encounter: “When I called out, he heard me, the God of my righteousness. When I was in trouble, you gave me freedom: now, take pity on me and listen to my prayer.” (Psalm 4) My NFP (Natural Family Planning) Story mirrors this Psalm. This verse professes staunch faith and hope in the Lord, proclaims His loving plan, embraces the freedom of His plan, but still pleads and cries out in prayer and supplication for His mercy and grace. My NFP journey is strewn with seemingly insurmountable obstacles coupled with immeasurable healing sometimes physical but even more so spiritual and emotional.

Three years ago, I “knew” learning, practicing, and utilizing Creighton NFP (a method inspired by St. Paul VI’s Humanae Vitae) as a single, unmarried young adult as a diagnostic tool for my reproductive health would be a physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual stretch. The method did not disappoint in that regards and exceeded my expectations in providing a plethora of opportunities for personal growth and maturation. What surprised me and rattled me to my core would be the profound revelation of my femininity through the eyes of my Creator. A glimpse that many women and men in our modern times never experience for various reasons or willfully reject.

The liberating message of the Gospel of Life has been put into your hands.” – Saint John Paul II. When I passed by the sarcophagus of then Bl. Paul VI now Saint Paul VI, I felt little happiness or liberation in that precise moment. The weight of physical, emotional strain coupled with the confusion of international travel and the stress of unknown outcomes wore heavily on me topped with mind-altering migraine medications. I wasn’t prepared for my encounter with the remains of a man who championed the truth and suffered for it decades before my earthly existence. The precise truth I choose to suffer with and for today.

After celebrating early morning Mass in St. Peter’s a few days later, after a few days of reflection and improved sleep, I chose to encounter St. Pope Paul VI. I bee-lined across the vast expanse of St. Peter’s Basilica towards the entrance into the Tomb of the Popes. My deft footsteps echoed softly on the marble floors. I slid silently onto a massive, glossy wooden kneeler placed before his tomb for the devout onlooker to stop and pray in preparation for his impending canonization. I knelt before the remains of a Saint- a Saint of my century.

My eyes glazed over staring at St. Paul VI’s sarcophagus as a flood of memories, experiences, pain, sadness, confusion, desperation, hope, joy, gratitude, and awe flooded before me. My mind raced as emotions and feelings frantically jumped in a thousand directions. I buried my head into my hands as the tears threatened to tumble down my cheeks. The din of tourists’ footsteps floated around me but left me untouched. St. Paul VI and I had our moment.

In our own ways, we both made a life-altering choice by choosing a lasting but unpopular truth. Amid the cultural clamoring and storms of confusion, we anchored ourselves to the firm foundation of God’s design for mankind in His deliberate and intelligent design for man and woman for family, intimacy, and reproduction. We both paid an earthly price for that choice. We both suffered. We both loved.

Kneeling there in tears, I recognized many of the female and male tourists admiring their surroundings rejected the teachings of Pope Paul VI and Humanae Vitae. We all live with the repercussions. I verged towards angry. Then a young adult man about my age knelt down beside me. Two young adults one man and one woman both products of the St. John Paul II era and the new evangelization knelt before the tomb of St. Paul VI champion for Human Life and Father of Truth in humble supplication. In that moment, I felt hope.

There is more to my story with my encounter with St. Paul VI (more that I’m still processing and accepting) but this gives you a glimpse at how God works in surprising and mysterious ways. “For man cannot attain that true happiness for which he yearns with all the strength of his spirit, unless he keeps the laws which the Most High God has engraved in his very nature. These laws must be wisely and lovingly observed. – Humanae Vitae

May God bless and keep you all in 2019!

Merry Christmas!

Wishing you and your loved ones a very Blessed & Merry Christmas! May the light of the Christ Child shine in your life today and always! Thank you for your support of Chronically Catholic Blog! You are all in my prayers this Christmas Season.

God Bless,

Hannah

Christmas Blog

Monthly Devotion: Our Lady of Guadalupe, Pray for Us!

3-full-virgen-de-guadalupeHappy Feast Day of Our Lady of Guadalupe or Nuestra Señora de Guadalupe or the Virgen de Guadalupe, Patroness of the Americas & the Unborn! 

Our Lady of Guadalupe to Saint Juan Diego:

“Know my son, my much beloved, that I am the ever Virgin Mary, Mother of the True God who is the Author of life, the Creator of all things, the Lord of heaven and earth, present everywhere. And it is my wish that here, there be raised to me a temple in which, as a loving mother to thee and those like thee, I shall show my tender clemency and the compassion I feel for the natives and for those who love and seek me, for all who implore my protection, who call on me in their labors and afflictions: and in which I shall hear their weeping and their supplications that I may give them consolation and relief. That my will may have its effect, thou must go to the city of Mexico and to the palace of the bishop who resides there, to tell him that I have sent thee and that I wish a temple to be raised to me in this place. Thou shalt report what thou hast seen and heard, and be assured that I will repay what thou dost for me in the charge I give thee: for I will make thee great and renowned. Now thou hast heard, son, my wish. Go in peace. . . employ all of the strength thou art able.”

-December 9, 1531-

Coronation of the Image of Our Lady of Guadalupe Prayer:

Blessed are you, O Lord,
God of heaven and earth,
who, in your mercy and justice,
cast down the proud,
and exalt the humble.

In the wondrous designs of your providence,
you have offered a perfect model
in the Incarnate Word and in the Virgin Mother:
Your Son, who voluntarily humbled Himself,
even to death on the Cross,
shines in eternal glory
and sits at your right hand
as King of kings and Lord of lords.

And the Virgin, who desired to call herself your handmaid,
who was chosen as Mother of the Redeemer
and true Mother of the living,
and now, lifted up above the choirs of angels,
gloriously reigns beside her Son,
interceding for all men,
the advocate of grace
and queen of mercy.

Look with kindness, O Lord, on these your servants
who, in placing a royal diadem
upon the image of the Mother of your Son,
recognize in your Son the King of the universe,
and invoke, as Queen, the Virgin.

Grant that,
in following their example,
we too might consecrate ourselves to your service,
and make ourselves available to others,
fulfilling the law of charity,
thus triumphing over selfishness,
and in generously giving
we might lead our brothers and sisters to you.

Grant that,
seeking humility on earth,
we might one day be lifted to the heights of heaven,
where you yourself will place
on the heads of your faithful
the crown of life.

Through Christ our Lord.

Amen

 

Be Satisfied With Me

snowflakes
Photo Credit: Isaiah Eyre Photography

Feeling distracted and overwhelmed this Advent Season? Loosing sight of the reason for the season? Christmas blues?

-A Poem Attributed to St. Anthony of Padua-

Everyone longs to give themselves completely to someone,
To have a deep soul relationship with another,
To be loved thoroughly and exclusively.

But to a Christian, God says, “No, not until you are satisfied,
Fulfilled and content with being loved by me alone,
With giving yourself totally and unreservedly to me.
With having an intensely personal and unique relationship with me alone.

Discovering that only in me is your satisfaction to be found,
Will you be capable of the perfect human relationship,
That I have planned for you.
You will never be united to another
Until you are united with me.
Exclusive of anyone or anything else.
Exclusive of any other desires or longings.
I want you to stop planning, to stop wishing, and allow me to give you
The most thrilling plan existing . . . one you cannot imagine.
I want you to have the best. Please allow me to bring it to you.

You just keep watching me, expecting the greatest things.
Keep experiencing the satisfaction that I am.
Keep listening and learning the things that I tell you.
Just wait, that’s all. Don’t be anxious, don’t worry
Don’t look around at things others have gotten
Or that I have given them
Don’t look around at the things you think you want,
Just keep looking off and away up to me,
Or you’ll miss what I want to show you.
And then, when you’re ready, I’ll surprise you with a love
Far more wonderful than you could dream of.

You see, until you are ready, and until the one I have for you is ready,
I am working even at this moment
To have both of you ready at the same time.
Until you are both satisfied exclusively with me.

(Amen.)

You are beautiful. You are enough. You are Made in His Image. Happy Advent!

Monthly Devotion: St. Andrew Christmas Novena or Christmas Anticipation Novena

St. Andrew Christmas Novena

A medieval tradition, the St. Andrew Christmas Novena or Christmas Anticipation Novena beings on the Feast of St. Andrew the Apostle and continues all four weeks of Advent ending on Christmas Day. This novena helps prepare us for the Birth of Our Lord. Tradition states that women used to pray this novena for a good and godly spouse.

Please, join me in praying the Christmas Anticipation Novena!

Forgive and Forget? My brain wasn’t designed for that.

forgiveness (1)

The holidays are upon us opening doors to joy and blessings and suffering and wounds. Real forgiveness doesn’t equate to the secular quip, “Forgive and forget” which by the way is cognitively impossible unless brain trauma exists. Real forgiveness is an act of the will, an act of love not a feeling or emotion. “Forgiveness is an act of the will, and the will can function regardless of the temperature of the heart.” – Corrie ten Boom.

Psychologist believe about 90% of hurts inflicted are unintentional, leaving room for 10% of intentional wounding and maiming. But people still feel 100% of the hurts whether intentional or unintentional. When a person feels threatened (i.e., someone is about to learn something that they don’t want as public or private knowledge,) they react. As you approach a wounded dog, even with the best intentions, the dog either runs away (flight) or snaps at you (fight.) People “act out” too, in various methods and manners. Except, with our God-given intellect and cognitive capabilities, humans can be crueler and more calculated in inflicting hurt. This is where forgiveness come in.

Forgiveness acknowledges wrong-doing or bad behavior and does not excuse it. Uncover the wounds by listing “who?” and “how?” Articulate the “how,” “why,” etc. This knowledge is followed by evaluating whether your personal behavior needs to change or boundaries set in-place. Make decisions. Sometimes this step involves seeking professional counseling or pastoral care. God didn’t request us to be doormats. He did ask us to turn the other cheek, but then what?

My counselor describes: “Your friend is sitting next to you and keeps poking your eye. You shouldn’t let your friend keep poking you in the eye (if you do, that is a a deeper issue.) You have a few options. 1.) Tell your friend to STOP! and your friend stops and can remain sitting beside you. 2.) Tell you friend to STOP! but your friend still pokes occasionally. You request they move across the room from you. 3.) Tell your friend to STOP! but your friend keeps poking whether next to you or across the room from you. You need to ask your friend to leave the room, i.e. BOUNDARIES.

To achieve forgiveness you don’t need reconciliation or an apology. Why? People apologize all the time without meaning a word. A sincere apology is rare. Sometimes apologies do more harm than good. For example, a women or man who has experienced intimate partner violence does not need to reconnect with their abusive partner to gain an apology. Reconnecting could be dangerous and harmful to the wounded person. Reconciliation requires repentance. Repentance is a free-will choice, and even God can’t make a person choose reconciliation and repentance. So neither can you or I.

Embracing an attitude of forgiveness frees the wounded. And allows for healing. Forgiveness, the person it frees is yourself. Authentic forgiveness allows people, like you and I, to make a choice in a bad situation. A choice that will either free us or shackle us. To take responsibility for my sins and transgressions but to embrace mercy and compassion. To forgive myself and others as Christ forgave. We are all sinners. And God loves us all. In the end, God is the judge and juror of our lives, but he did ask, “forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.” Amen.

*** This post was inspired by 4+ years of clinical, Catholic counseling. Don’t know where to start? Try searching for faith based, Catholic counselors @ LINK. May God bless you and keep you all.***

Saint of the Month: St. Elizabeth of the Trinity, Patron of Sick Persons

Bl. Elizabeth of the Trinity.
Photo Credit: Catholic News Agency

Born: Cher, France, July 18, 1880

Died: Carmel at Dijon France, November 9, 1906

Feast Day: November 8th

Patron Saint of: Sick Persons, Loss of parents, Against Illness

The eldest child of two girls, Elizabeth Catez was born and baptized on a military base in France to her parents- a self-made decorated military officer Jospeh Catez and his wife Marie Rolland. Following the unexpected death of Jospeh Catez in 1887, Marie Rolland moved her family to the less expensive Dijon, France where Elizabeth studied at the local Conservatory and excelled in music. During her childhood, she displayed a fiery temper and strong-willed temperament which caused her mother even threaten sending her to a house of correction for reform. Despite her strong-willed, fiery disposition Elizabeth was a generous and warmhearted child contrite and loving. When Elizabeth received her First Holy Communion and Confirmation in 1891, she began developing better self-control.

During her adolescence, she developed an ardent devotion to the Blessed Trinity. She visited the sick, sang in her Church choir, and taught religion to children who were factory workers. During one her visits to Carmel in Dijon, the mother superior provided Elizabeth a copy of the “Circular Letter of St. Therese of Lisieux” which was the first edition of what would become The Story of A Soul. This exposure to St. Therese’s writings brought clarity and courage to pursue her vocation. Elizabeth desired to enter the Discalced Caramelite Order and refused multiple offers of marriage. She respected her mother’s wishes and delayed entering Carmel until she was twenty-one years old. She entered Carmel at Dijon on August 2, 1901 and donned her habit December 8, 1901.

The Church and Carmelite communities in France were racked with social upheaval and uncertainty racked with the effects of corruption, scandal, and division. The secular State prepared to take legal action against the Church including the potential confiscation of Church property and the exile of the Carmelite Order from France. While the French Church crumbled into anxiety and confusion, St. Elizabeth witnessed the mystical power of the peace Christ’s presence in a soul could instill. As she explained to her community and friends, “Everything is a sacrament that gives us God.” She believed God was present in the distress. She wrote letters and retreats for her community and friends which emphasized contemplative prayer- loving awareness and silent surrender to the loving gaze of the Father.

St. Elizabeth was influenced and inspired by the writings of St. Therese of Lisieux including her prayer and poem “Offering to Merciful Love” and “Living by Love.” Elizabeth, like Therese, believed in the mystical power of prayer and the salvation of souls. Elizabeth also embraced a “Little Way”- a radical approach to love. “I find Him everywhere while doing the wash as well as while praying.” Or another selection from her writings: “We must be mindful of how God is in us in the most intimate way and go about everything with him. Then life is never banal. Even in ordinary tasks, because you do not live for these things, you will go beyond them.”

st. elizabeth of the trinity

St. Elizabeth wrote: “I think that in Heaven my mission will be to draw souls by helping them to go out of themselves in order to cling to God by a wholly simple and loving movement, and to keep them in this great silence within which will allow God to communicate Himself to them and to transform them into Himself.” She practiced a profound devotion of the Blessed Trinity which she referred to as “the furnace of an excessive love.” 

As she neared the end of her earthly life, St. Elizabeth referred to herself as Laudem Gloriae or “praise of glory.” On November 9, 1906, at the age of twenty-six, after arduous and painful suffering, St. Elizabeth, the Mystic of Dijon, died of Addison’s disease an adrenal disorder which in the early 20th century no treatment existed.  She accepted suffering as a gift from God. Her last words were: “I am going to Light, to Love, to Life!”

Her beatification process started in 1931 and her manuscripts were carefully investigated over the next ten years and approved for her cause for beatification in 1944. October 25, 1961 Pope Saint John XXIII declared her Servant of God. On October 12, 1982 Pope Saint John Paul II declared her Venerable and Beatified her in Paris on November 25, 1984 after the investigation of her first miracle was verified. After a second miracle attributed to the intercession of St. Elizabeth of the Trinity was verified and approved, Pope Francis canonized her on October 16, 2016.

St. Elizabeth of the Holy Trinity, pray for us!

Here is a LINK to her Holy Trinity Prayer.

 

Prayer for the Holy Souls in Purgatory

November begins with two important Church Feasts: The Solemnity of All Saints & All Souls. Within the month of November, we strive to remember the souls of the faithful departed and the holy souls in Purgatory. Our souls on Earth, the Saintly Souls in Heaven, and the Holy Souls in Purgatory are all connected within the Communion of Saints. Our prayers impact souls.

According to tradition, St. Gertrude the Great was told by Our Lord that the following prayer, each time she devoutly recited it, would release 1,000 souls (or a vast number) from their suffering in purgatory:

Prayer of St. Getrude